Giveaway! Win a copy of "Not Alone"

Today, I'm honored to be over at author Anna Weaver's website, sharing a little bit about "Not Alone". The interview includes a giveaway -- please come on over and enter to win a copy!

Here's a little snippet of the interview Anna conducted with me about the book - in this paragraph, I have a chance to explain the book's crazy-long subtitle! :)

The book I'm featuring today is "Not Alone: A Literary Companion For Those Confronted with Miscarriage and Infertility". 

I know that's a mouthful of a subtitle! But we wanted readers to know what they were picking up. 

"Literary" because it's a book of essays. So very many people have shared this kind of suffering and so we wanted to feature a multitude of perspectives. 

"Companion" because the longing for a child -- either one you've lost or one you've never had -- can be a very lonely kind of suffering. We wanted people to know this book was full of people who had been there too, who want to walk beside you in your grief. 

And "Confronted" because this isn't something you ask for. It's something that comes upon you when you never wanted it and weren't looking for it. 

This is a book that doesn't pretend that these things are easy, but also confirms that God is good. And those two truths: that there is real sorrow and a good God who loves us ... those can be hard to reconcile. The contributors to "Not Alone" were really honest about *both*, and I think it's that honesty that makes the book so valuable.

Please head on over to Anna's place to read the rest!

Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell

This post contains Amazon affiliate links; if you purchase a book from this link, I receive a small percentage of the purchase price.  (See full disclosure on sidebar of my blog.)

Good reading: "Why miscarriage matters?"

Here's a link that's really good reading: "Why Miscarriage Matters If You're Pro-Life".  It's an older post, but it's very good. Here's a snippet of it:

Here are some of the mixed messages I received -- sometimes just hinted at, other times outright: 

An aborted baby deserves to be grieved. A miscarried one deserves to be gotten over. And quickly. 

An aborted baby could have been the next Einstein or Bach or Mother Theresa. A miscarried baby was probably damaged goods.

Please go read the rest over at The Lewis Note, because the author offers some really helpful thoughts about consistency in our thinking about the unborn and also some wonderful ideas about how to support those who have suffered a miscarriage.

When I found this post, it resonated with me simply because it resonated with so many of the stories I read as I was editing "Not Alone". I wanted to signal-boost such important thoughts.

Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell




This post contains an Amazon affiliate link; if you purchase a book from this link, I receive a small percentage of the purchase price.  (See full disclosure on sidebar of my blog.)

"Not Alone" giveaway and interview!

I'm honored to be a guest today over at Lena Nelson Dooley's blog, talking about "Not Alone" and how miscarriage and infertility aren't "pretend griefs".  Here's a snippet:

These can be very private griefs, which lead to people feeling very alone. As the church, it’s important to comfort one another and to be there for each other—especially because, as Christians, we know that the unborn are real people, loved and known by God. And because we value children, and so can acknowledge that infertility is a real loss—not some pretend grief that people should just “buck up” and “get over.”

Please stop by Lena's place to read the rest, and to enter the #giveaway!


Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell


This post contains Amazon affiliate links. If you purchase something through these links, I'll receive a small percentage of the purchase price - for my own shopping! :) (See full disclosure on sidebar of my blog.)

A God Who Knows Grief

I'm honored today to be guest posting over at Sarah Ruut's blog. Here's a snippet:

Private grief is sometimes what we want. 

It's not always what we need. 

And it's never our only choice. Why? Because we serve a Lord who is familiar with suffering...

Please go read the rest over at Sarah's beautiful website! I hope it offers you a bit of encouragement for your day.


Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell

Come and say hi! (plus, a giveaway!)

I'm honored to be the Friday Featured Guest over at June Foster's blog today. Come on over and say hi in the comments!


Also, have you been curious about "Not Alone", but not quite sure you wanted to buy? Jennifer Hallmark has your solution! She's hosting a giveaway of "Not Alone" over at Elaine Stock's blog. Head on over in order to enter!

-Jessica Snell

Infertility and Miscarriage - in the authors' own words

This is a follow-up to yesterday's post, where I wrote a bit on what I noticed while editing "Not Alone". I thought it only fitting to use today's post to direct you towards some reflections from the actual contributors to the book, so here's a small link round-up of their thoughts:


-Jared Begg, on promoting a book about such hard topics:

I contributed to a book again . . . The first book was uplifting in theme and overtly worshipful. 

This second book is a little different than that.

-Marcy Ratcliff, on all the emotions reading the book brought up:

These beautiful, heartbreaking stories. I want to hug everyone in the world. Especially every mother, but also every father, everyone yearning for a child, even everyone not. Those struggling with other things and those who are like, Why are you hugging me, you crazy lady?!

-Jennifer Hallmark, in an interview about writing her contribution:

It could be called an "edgy" Chicken Soup for the Soul. By edgy, I mean the essays, written by men and women who've dealt with the pain and emotions that come with miscarriage and/or infertility, are heart cries. These stories are told by broken people who have found hope in the midst of their struggle.

-Finally, Anna Gissing on "Advent and Infertility":

And even now, God sees and hears you. God knows your unfulfilled longings and desires.

If you've experienced miscarriage or infertility, or if you (like me) want to understand your loved ones who have been in this place, considering picking up a copy of "Not Alone".


Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell



This post contains Amazon affiliate links.  See full disclosure on sidebar of my blog.

things I learned about infertility and miscarriage

"Not Alone", the book on infertility and miscarriage that I edited last year, is still occupying my thoughts.

And how could it not? The generous people who shared their struggles in that book have stories so full of pain and hope, of anger and love, of so many other conflicting emotions and honest feelings, that I think their stories will always stay with me.

I'm looking back over some of what I learned as I spent so much time with their words. The list below is far from comprehensive, but there were some observable patterns that emerged from their stories, and I thought I'd share them here.

(I want to add: I really cherish these observations, because all of the essayists who submitted to this project really put not just their hearts, but their minds into this project, and I appreciate how much it costs to really think through a painful experience, and to offer those thoughts up for the perusal of others.)

Here are a few things I noticed, as I reviewed these essays:

-Every person's experience is unique. No one feels pain quite the same way, and circumstance and personality mean that everyone feels loss differently.

-The loss of a child, or absence of wanted children, is more common than we'd like to think. A common thread among these entries is that the writers had no idea how many other people had been through the same pain until they admitted their own hurt. And then they found themselves surrounded by a crowd of sympathetic friends.

-Husbands and wives experience these losses differently, even within the same marriage.

-Music speaks to us when nothing else can. About half the "Works Cited" page in this book are references to songs.


I hope this book makes its way into the hands of people who are suffering in these situations, and into the hands of their loved ones. Just because this can be such a lonely pain, and it doesn't have to be. You are not alone.


Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell

"Not Alone: A Literary Companion for Those Confronted with Infertility and Miscarriage"

It sounds weird to say that I'm very excited about this book release precisely because this book is not a cheerful book.

It's not. It's about infertility and miscarriage, and it's not a cheerful book.

But I hope very much that it's a good one.


I didn't contribute a chapter to this book. Instead, I had the honor of editing it.

And it was indeed an honor. The people who share their stories here are generous, honest, and brave. They're generous with their lives, willing to share their own stories in order to help others. They're honest about what actually happened, and don't shy away from the parts of their experiences that are hard or ugly. And they're brave enough to be open about what it's actually like to lose a beloved child before birth, or to never be able to conceive that very-loved child in the first place.

It's these contributors who make me excited about this book release. Because they are amazing people and their work is worth reading.

The hope behind this book is that those who are in the middle of their own encounter with these hard things will find companions here. Those who can walk alongside, who can say, "I know" and really mean it, and who can sit and stay and weep with and understand.

These stories testify to the fact that both miscarriage and infertility can be lonely experiences. We hope this book makes them a little less so.


Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell

Weekly Links: Rainbow Recipes, Horror vs. Terror, and more!

Some good reading for your weekend:

"27 Rainbow Recipes that Will Bring Joy to Your Life": So pretty.

"Why the Shift from Horror to Terror on 'CSI' Is a Problem":

There is a fine line between accurate storytelling—wherein a crime show might show some violence to tell an honest story about the consequences of wrongdoing—and gratuitous depiction, in which violence is portrayed not for the sake of the story but for the spectacle of it. 

"Fittest Type of All Disciples: Bartholomew/Nathanael":

Because of the way Nathanael is brought to Jesus, commentator Rudolf Stier calls Nathanel "the fittest type of all disciples." God has already been at work on him in multiples ways; he is summoned by the witness of another disciple; and he is introduced directly to Jesus, converted by his word. Nathanael's faith is the occasion of Jesus first "truly, truly I say to you" statement.

"Mincemeat: on Writing":

As a writer and a mother of two children, I thought I didn't have any spare time. And then we added twins to our family, and I wondered what I used to do with all that spare time. 

"The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think":

. . . human beings have a deep need to bond and form connections. It's how we get our satisfaction. If we can't connect with each other, we will connect with anything we can find -- the whirr of a roulette wheel or the prick of a syringe. He says we should stop talking about 'addiction' altogether, and instead call it 'bonding.' A heroin addict has bonded with heroin because she couldn't bond as fully with anything else. 

So the opposite of addiction is not sobriety. It is human connection.

"Am I Empty?":

Empty.  It needs to be said.  Infertility and miscarriage leave one empty.  There is pain.  There is loss. Someone is missing. That needs to be acknowledged. Years later, there are scars.  I felt it then; I feel them now.  I contemplated the starkness of the word, the label.  My label.  My label?

"Measles Is Horrible":

Before the vaccine, the United States saw approximately 4 million cases of measles each year and 400 to 500 deaths. These are the stats that vaccine-deniers tend to emphasize—a relatively low number of deaths compared with the number of infections. However, those statistics alone leave out a big part of measles infections. Prevaccine, almost 48,000 people were also hospitalized each year because of measles and measles complications. One in 20 of those infected developed pneumonia. More rarely but more seriously, each year 1,000 became chronically disabled due to measles encephalitis. 

Measles is not a benign disease.

Call for Submissions on infertility and miscarriage (updated)

This is an update of a post that originally appeared here:

I'm editing a book for Kalos Press on infertility and miscarriage, and we're seeking submissions. If you're a Christian writer who has experienced either infertility or miscarriage, and are interested in submitting an essay for consideration, please see the call for submissions here.

And to give you an idea of where we're coming from editorially, here's a bit from the introduction-to-be:

This isn’t a book that offers solutions – there are plenty of experts for that. Nor is this a book that expounds theological explanations for pain and loss – that necessary job is already well done elsewhere.

What this book offers is simpler, and more primary: it offers companionship. No one loss is like any other, yet sharing our losses can offer, if not true solace, at least the comfort of knowing there is someone else there beside you in the dark, someone who understands. We hope that in sharing these stories you will gain the words and phrase to better frame, to better comprehend, to better share, your own story.

ETA: Deadline: Submissions are due by June 1, 2014.

Format: Each piece should be written as a personal essay of 1500-2500 words. While non-fiction, please use a narrative, story-telling style that draws the reader into the piece.

Further notes on format, from the Kalos website:

The book will be devotional/Christian Reflection in style and may be written in a first-person point of view. This project will address the topics from all stages: the early lost, confused, hurt parts; the boiling anger that comes; the moments of joy in the midst that surprise us; the exhaustion and apathy that some deal with; the redemptive work of God in and through impossibly hard times; etc.

We are also interested to see submitters address things they know now that they wish someone could have shared with them. Our goal is to provide a resource for people who are struggling; it won't necessarily make anyone feel better or always offer counsel/advice, but it could assuage some of the sense of isolation. We want to offer a literary companion to others on the sometimes-lonely path that these issues require.

If you're interested in submitting a piece to the project, please take a look at the link, and feel free to contact me with any questions.

Thanks!

Peace of Christ to you,
Jessica Snell